Your ideology of marriage will determine how you will enjoy your marriage. Your concept of what a relationship is all about will go a long way in determining how lasting your relationship will be.
Below are the different beliefs of people:
1. Human beings evolved. They believe all of life started from water and evolved over time through the principle of evolution.
2.There is another school of thought that believes that you are created to decide what is best for you. You have the freedom to choose who you become and how you live your life.
3.Same sex marriage. There are still others that believe in same sex marriage.
4.No commitment. Still some others believe that they can have children without having any form of commitment with any man or woman.
5.Having sex mates. Some also believe in having just sex mates who will not prevent them from having the freedom to decide whatever they want in other aspects of their lives.
The list goes on and on. These explain the opening statements.
Having a lasting relationship will require basic foundational knowledge as stated below;
1.God instituted marriage in the first place.
2.Willingness to submit your marriage/ relationship to God. If you admit that it all started from God, then there must be a willing heart to let God take the lead in that relationship.
3.Resolved commitment to do it God’s way.If you have decided that God should take the lead, then there must be a corresponding courage and action on your part to do whatever it requires to get it done his way, whether it’s convenient or not.
4.Constant engagement of his help. You need to come to terms with the fact that your human effort will not take you far. There are different phases in your marriage that need God’s help. It is the only way you can scale through difficult seasons on this life time journey.
5.Love your spouse the way s/he is, not the way you want him/her to be.
There is danger in assuming that you will change your spouse after you get married. What if s/he does not change at the end of the day, will you still be able to live with him/her the rest of your life? If your answer is no, then you need to give it a serious consideration because you don’t have the power to change a human life, only God can. Am I saying changes are impossible? Absolutely not. But that assumption that s/he will eventually change should be taking out because things might likely not play out the way you have imagined it.
In conclusion, effective communication is very important for you to enjoy a lasting relationship in your marriage. There are three major pillars of communication. These are openness, understanding and trust. The degree to which you are opened to each other will determine the level of understanding you will have of each other. In the same vein, your level of understanding has a direct relationship with your level of trust. The more understanding you have, the more trust you will experience and vice versa.
Appropriating all these in your marriage walk will make you live in a world of peace, harmony, joy and progress, shielding you from the nutty issues that generally plague marriages out there. When you are protected from what affect marriages, lasting and fulfilling experience in your marriage becomes your physical reality and not just what you hear people talk about.
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