The ugly experiences of your past should be translated into inspiring messages and not excuses for failure. These includes, but not limited to;
Dysfunctional home, leading to hardship in the life of the child with an eventual single parent
Death of a parent at an early age, now subjected to foster parents
You were abandoned only to be raised by welfare homes
You came from a poor background in a poor neighborhood
Incomplete education due to lack of funds and compelled to take up menial jobs
Suffered child abuse from authority figures
Different strokes for different folks and the above stated conditions are very unfortunate for those who were victims of the circumstances. Sometimes you sit down and ponder over your life; you wonder why life is unfair to you. Why me? Three years ago, she walked into my office to serve a meal I ordered for. After serving the meal and getting to the door, she turned back and asked ‘Who can one talk to when you are in need?’ I responded almost immediately, ‘to the person in charge of the welfare unit’. As she turned to leave, I invited her back and asked; ‘what is it all about?’ She went on to narrate her story; I have my high school results, and I decided to be a sales girl in order to raise money to make progress in my life. There is an exam that I need to write to get me into an institution of higher learning. I discussed with my madam (boss) and she promised to enroll me in a special tutorial center but kept postponing indefinitely. I am afraid the deadline is pretty close and I don’t want to take chances of delaying myself for another one year. So, I need counsel and also someone who can help me to get the forms so I don’t miss out. ‘What happened to your parents?’ I asked, ‘My parents live in a rural area and survive on the meager sum they could find, they decided I should go fend for myself, leading to my present predicament’ she replied. She continued ‘I am doing this out of necessity, not out of love for the work. I work seven days a week, round the clock. I remain awake, preparing for the next day up until midnight almost every day and sleep when I can in a run-down structure that serves as the kitchen.’ Her story touched and moved me, so much that I asked her to discuss with my wife. After much deliberation, we decided to invite her to live with us. She’s been with us from that time till date. In the course of her stay, she passed her entrance exam into an institution of higher learning to study for a Diploma in Mass Communication. After obtaining her Diploma, she did her internship and was employed in the banking sector. Now, she has a changed perspective, the former, seemingly local and uncultured lady by reason of association has been refined to a large extent.
What lessons can we draw from this? 1. Understandably, you may have ugly stories from your past. But your past must not be allowed to put you in a contained position. She ventured out to get something doing, irrespective of the nature of the job. An idiom puts it in perspective; nothing ventured, nothing gained – something that you say which means that it is necessary to take risks in order to achieve something. 2. She became dissatisfied. This state pushed her to open her mouth to make inquiry into where possible help could come from. She did not allow her present situation push her into making silly mistakes. Your current experiences may not be your ultimate reality, therefore, do not let it dictate the pattern of your life. She had an option of following men to offer her body in exchange for money. She also had the option of joining bad association that will guarantee her protection and security, but she chose to make necessary inquiries. 3. She took a bold step and subjected herself to us when we took her in to train her like she had never experienced before. Though it was not a pleasant experience trying to train a grown-up who already had a formed opinion about many areas of life, a lot of adjustments were made as it relates to character, attitude, behavioral patterns, and manners.
We decided to be a major contributor to her success story, and that kept us going even when we didn’t feel like it. You don’t have to allow whatever ugly experiences you may have had to limit you. There is always someone to talk to, and this does not suggest you talk to every Tom, Dick and Harry. You need to sit down and think thoroughly about your situation, and let God help you see the right person to talk to. The right person will show you the next step and possibly be involved in ensuring that you make success out of the seeming ugly experiences you may have.
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