You Are Here: Home » Marriage » Life Stages

Life Stages

Posted by : Dele Agbogun Posted date : March 18, 2013 In Marriage 0

The phase you are in life will determine your priorities and the important things in your life. From the beginning of your life and into adulthood, you are exposed to various experiences at every stage of your development. Each stage has its uniqueness and importance attached in relation to your life.

When I view the trend in our world, I see what goes on at the children to teenage level of development. Fun and creativity are very important in what they do. No matter how laudable your idea, if there is no link to these two, it will not create the excitement they seek. When you advance from one stage to another, your priorities change gradually.

This post intend to state those stages, the important things at those varying stages, and understanding their inter-connectivity in order to make the most out of it. It should be noted each stage has its own uniqueness. An attempt to apply the approach of one to the other without adequate adaptation will only result to friction and misunderstanding among the people in those stages.

Stages of our Life

1. Starting out in life.

a. Entertainment. The earlier stage of life sees celebrations, enjoyment, lots of laughs as the priority activities.

b. Social life. Generally, we humans are relational beings. The relational aspect is so strong that hanging out with friends and mutual interactions becomes a key event at this phase of life.

c. Acceptance. Sense of belonging is critical at this stage. You want to know which “clique” you fit in the most, where you are welcomed and feel the family atmosphere.

2. Discovering who you are and your purpose.

a. Connection. When you build relationships, you discover your uniqueness, and the categories of people you fit into.

b. Significance. At this stage, you are sensitive to the contribution you are making to the group. You want your life to count and make a difference. You want to be known for something that you can term as a label.

c. Relevance. You want to re-assure yourself that you are needed because of the difference your contribution brings. This is similar to significance because you want to be sure that there is meaningful difference your involvement is causing.

3. Settling down in terms of family and job/career.

a. Marriage. At this stage, there is an inner yearning for responsibility. There is a sense of settlement that is uppermost. You feel it is about time to start making contribution, not just to a group but at a community or national scale. The previous relationship with an opposite sex is taken to a higher commitment to settling with one person the rest of your life.

b. Raising children. When the marriage is decided, the next possible step is raising children. This differs from one couple to the next, depending on the agreement between both parties.

c. Responsibilities (planning for children’s future). The next step after raising kids has started is the future arrangement of the kids. You want to be sure whether their primary, college or university will be in the private, public or outside the country. You are weighing your options at this stage with the financial implications.

4. Middle age, getting close to retirement stage.

a. Security (family and business or career). This stage is a serious minded stage where you want to put measures in place to guarantee the security of your future as it relates to your family and career. You want to be sure you are in the right career and you are doing things that will secure the future even after you stop working for an organisation.

b. Caring for the elderly parents. At this stage, you have aged parents and you are concern about their well-being. You feel a sense of responsibility to give them the best of their remaining years in life.

c. Mid-life crisis. This stage is characterized by possible but not necessarily all; children misbehaving to a point of becoming a concern to be managed (drugs, drinking, immoral affair issues, character issues etc.)

5. Old age: Re-inventing or succession stage.

a. Security. The security at this stage is not about your children, but more about your life and that of your spouse. This is because at this stage, you have entered the contrasting phase of your life where you have shrink back to you and your spouse. You want to be sure that you don’t end up depending on children or other people for your survival.

b. Continuity. This point is common to the wealthy. You want to be sure that your estates, multinational company, assets, built over decades are not destroyed. You are concerned about the continuity of the family legacy.

c. Protection of your asset (wealth, business).The position of the last point considered, informs this one. Your primary headache is getting the right responsible person you can trust.

d. Requiring care at home. Within this stage, you get to a point where your energy drive must have gone down. You gradually grow with the increasing need for care and help.

e. Reviewing inheritance. This is about the last phase before departing from the world. You are making final reviews and guarantees, involving lawyers from the legal angle, perfecting every loose ends and making necessary last adjustment before the home call arrives.

f. Emptiness. At this stage, you take a bow to the “ALL OF LIFE”. You finally break the finishing line. You will leave back to your maker empty and naked the same way you entered the world empty and naked.

The essence of this post is to help you broaden your understanding. Many people lives myopic life, limiting themselves to the small part of life they understand. The fact that you don’t know does not necessarily make it irrelevant. What it requires is to improve on your knowledge bank. The more understanding you have about the connections of these stages; the more likely you are going to make better judgement. Most people have misjudged the way of life of people in other stages due to their limited scope of knowledge. They have their understanding skewed. Let us keep an open mind to understand the big picture and see how each of the stages of life is important and inter-dependent. The stages should not be judged wrongly, instead make attempt to guide the supposed stage towards successful transition to next stage.

When this is done you will maximize each stage you are in per time. The most critical is the prime of your life where you have energy and intelligence at your disposal. It is at this point you will make any possible legacy you can leave to this world.